[Video] With ash in your mouth, you'll ask it to burn again

[burnt_offering]

[The SmartSnail comes on suddenly, and two jeering youths can be seen making obscene gestures and laughing at the phone they've found. They seem to be pleased with themselves, and their unpleasant adventure starts with flipping up their middle fingers and slapping their butts at the camera.

Ah, the joys of youth.] Finders keepers, bitches. Whoever dropped this? Your loss! We got new tech now! [They give up on selfie time, and decide to use the camera function to keep a record of their destruction. They drag knives into every surface, kick over anything in their path, and brag about their piracy prowess in slurred drunk voices as the continue.] Oh shit, what's that? Hey, can you see-" [The name of the person is slurred beyond being audible, and they pull out a flashlight and shine it into the distance. They drag the weak light jerkily over a wide area, but find themselves staring at a grave . The light hits the top of it at first, and they murmur and mumble in slurred voices about what they could do if they took it apart.] So this is where the sorry bastard ended up. Guess the stones are worth something if nothing el-[A high pitched shriek emits from one of the men as he shines the light from the top of the grave, and then down to a huddled figure shaking at the bottom of it. The figure's back is facing the camera, scarred grotesquely, and a soft noise emits from the direction they're sitting in as they slowly rock back and forth.] Shit. Just a drunk. Go home! We claimed this place! Get out![No response comes.] Fuck off, and go! [One of them comes closer, and tries to kick at the figure while the other laughs and films.

But as he does, the form ignites. And the camera is dropped, shutting off as it meets the ground hard.]

Comments

[raiseyou]

[ Marco can't rightly say he expected this reaction, but it's also not surprising. Ace has always been unpredictable and wild. And somehow, underneath where he's strong and unbreakable, a certain, indescribable kind of fragile. He has a heart bigger than their whole damn fleet and it's both bursting and full of room for anyone who needs it... but there's always been a desperation in him. It became the less outward and flashy part of him over time, but it never went away. ]

[ And he died. And now he's back. And there's no question that he knows it and remembers it with how he bursts, that this wellspring of emotion is more than just seeing his own name engraved in stone. Marco says nothing, just holds onto him through the scramble of grappling and scratching, holds him tight. And when the sobbing comes, he threads his fingers into that thick, wild unkempt hair and holds Ace to his chest, keeping his own tears silent so he can be something strong and stable for Ace to anchor to after the black sea of who knows what. ]

[burnt_offering]

[Ace cries. And he cries. And he holds onto Marco and cries until he finally makes a disgusting noise and pushes himself away hard. He's not going to be sick on him, and he doesn't want to be ill at all, but he's worked himself up until there's no holding the uglier parts of sorrow back. And he stumbles away with a wobbly gait, empties his stomach, and struggles back over to what right now is the only thing that feels like life to him.

Marco. Ace bites at his lower lip, not sure what he wants to say, or what he's trying to hold back. And instead he just unceremoniously flops against him, winding his arms around for any comfort or stability he can get. He's still confused, but if he could be ill, then he's probably not dead after all.

Did he die at all? He doesn't understand. Dead people don't come back. They don't hurt either. Or do they?

If he wasn't dead, where had he gone?] It was cold. [He's not sure if he's still cold or not. Or why he thinks this is the most important bit of information to come up.] Shit, Marco. Did I die? I think I died. I can't remember. What happened? You know, right? [He looks a little steadier but his eyes are wild with fear.]

[raiseyou]

[ Cold. ]

[ Somehow, that's the worst part of all of this. ]

[ Marco keeps his grief as silent as he can, biting his lip and holding on, until that retch comes. He doesn't recoil, but he lets Ace, lets him have that space no matter how much it tears at him. The least he can give him is the dignity of not throwing up on either of them. ]

[ But as soon as he turns back Marco's on his feet, meeting him halfway, the shelf of his hand a brace for Ace's shaky hand and his body a buoy in this storm. ]

[ Ace collapses and Marco sits down with him, less fully on the grave and more in the grass just next to it. Pulls the smaller man into his lap. ]

[ But it was cold. ]

[ And a snivel finally sticks in Marco's nose, his teeth biting into his lip to try to hold it back. But when Ace just... asks like that... Fuck. He drops his face into the other's boiling hot neck - Ace's skin always runs hot, always burning like the fire inside him, and that more than anything is what makes the cold sound so wrong - and his own damn bursts and he sobs, once, gritting his teeth and holding tight and no, no, fuck, he has to be the rock here, fuck. ]

Idiot. [ Fuck. ] You've been dead for two fucking years, fuck, how are you even here you bastard we've all missed you so fucking much...

[burnt_offering]

"I'm not supposed to be here. I'm not supposed to be here! I don't know how I'm here. I'm-I don't want to die!"

[All of his world is shaking at hearing Marco's one horrible sob, it reverberates and he's still so confused. And he feels so damn guilty. He hurt one of his brothers, no, he hurt all of his brothers. Pops too. And he left them and went to that cold place of darkness that he can't remember no matter how hard he tries to.

He failed them. All of them.] "So sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to go."

[Two years, two years. So much can happen in two years, and he just clings again, refusing to move away for anything now. And he trembles, another fit coming fast and hard, leaving him unable to stop the tears this time.] "I'm okay. I'm okay. It's okay. Is Luffy alright? What happened? Pops? It's kind of blurry, what happened at the end. I can't remember exactly. I... Please." [He's not sure what he's asking for, honestly. He doesn't know if it's for information, for more comfort, for anything at all. Maybe he's just pleading with his own existence, not talking to Marco at all. It's just too much, and he doesn't know what to say.

So he just breathes slowly for a moment, trying to work his hand against Marco's back, trying to be soothing when he's still sobbing himself.] I'm here. I'm here now. I don't want to go back. [Soothing is a lot easier when you're not fresh from the grave, unfortunately.]

[raiseyou]

[ Ace, you... you idiot. ]

[ Marco's eyes clench shut more tightly, and he lets Ace ramble and sob for as long as it's frantic, letting him let it go. But when that clumsy hand tries to rub and soothe his back he scoffs and tightens his hold, grabbing Ace's arms and pulling them, carefully but firmly, up over his shoulders, around his neck. Stop trying to be strong every second, dammit. ]

Luffy's fine. Akainu didn't kill Luffy. We all stood in the way. Jimbei took off with Luffy. Trafalgar took Luffy in his submarine. Luffy's safe. It's been two years and Luffy's still okay, Luffy's still safe.

[ And still dethroning maniacs, but they can get to that. For now he just repeats Ace's baby brother's name, another port in a storm, an anchor and a promise. He's seen this kind of grief from survivors before, weathered it... but how do you get experience comforting people who returned from the dead? He'll have to hope it's similar, learn as he goes. Keep finding things to tether Ace here. ]

You're not going back. I won't let anyone touch you.

[ He will be the goddamn mooring line himself if he has to. ]

[burnt_offering]

[When his arms are pulled up, when he's in allowed and without words told to just cling and be protected by Marco something else breaks inside of him. He's not crying much more than before, it's all leveling off, but his mind is racing and he can't handle this. He feels so useless and weak, he died and left them all and nothing makes this right. And while that's awful, entrenched in the the painful memory of his own weakness, his own death, allowing Marco to take the reins and take care of him changes something. It's so good and safe and he's slowly moving from hysterics to hiccups, gentle sounds of sadness and confusing replacing the wild wailing.]

Luffy's safe, he's safe. Thank you, I was so fucking scared. I was so... [He trails off, curling in and against Marco as much as he can, trying to soak in that protect. Marco is good and safe and his brother, his nakama, so important to him. And he's a forced of nature in itself, there to help battle the cold and the pain and death.] Good. Cause I don't wanna go anywhere. I just wanna stay here with you, don't let me go.

[raiseyou]

We... [ Shit, Marco's nose starts burning before he can even finish his sentence, his tears welling right back up, and he takes a deep breath and grits his teeth. ] We couldn't make it to you. But like fuck were we gonna lose Luffy too.

[ Marco hadn't even met the kid before those dreadful hours of war, but that didn't matter. Doesn't. Ace cares so much about him. Marco's heard so many fucking stories. And if he was important enough for Ace to lay himself down, then even without Pops' say-so Marco would have protected him with his entire being. ]

[ Marco has no thoughts of any of this as weakness. Fragility, the crumbling under so much emotional weight... that's not the same thing as weakness. Ace is strong. Marco just wants to let him stop fucking bracing himself. ]

I won't. I've fucking got you. I've got you and you're alive and I'll kill anyone who fucking tries anything.

[burnt_offering]

[There's so much he wants to say, so much he wants to do, he's so mad at himself, he put himself in this damn situation. And everyone suffered because of it, and he'll never really forgive himself for hurting the people he loves so much.

But he can't really hold that over himself right now. Even that level of loathing takes a lot of effort, it's draining to hate yourself even a little, and to have so much anger and guilt takes a lot out of a person. With sadness, stress, and pain all on top of it, it's hard to handle. But all of that painful emotion still really isn't a match for the force that is Marco right now.

Marco, who is strong and protective and who says he'd kill for him, he'll keep him safe and how can Ace do anything to disagree in the face of that sort of comfort and power? No one's going to hurt him, as long as he's careful and doesn't fuck up again he'll be fine.

Or something close enough to it. So instead of thinking any more on how he messed up, how weak he became, how he did this to the people he cares about? He just takes a deep breath, he just breathes. Taking in how Marco smells, how he feels, and how his own heart is racing.

Shit. He really is alive.] I wanna stay with you. I'm alive. I'm really alive, I'm alive. Thank you, thank you so much. [He's not sure exactly what he's thankful for right now. Honestly, it's probably a lot of things. And somehow, he manages to get even tighter of a grip on Marco, and he's just still for a moment. Trying to stop the last of the tears, letting himself simply be safe and alive.]

[raiseyou]

[ Ah fuck, Ace... Marco softens under all that formless gratitude, still so angry at this world that took Ace away and spat him back out and furious that those fucking brats would try anything and livid that Ace has to feel like this but Ace is just... God, Ace is so good. Ace is always good and kind and full of love and Marco's heart's fucking breaking all over again, fuck. ]

[ He can't help himself. The force of will, the wall of impenetrable stone in Marco's soul that will be Ace's armor for as long as he needs it stays steady, but some of that overwhelming fury burns down. He tightens his grip as well, hand on the back of Ace's head holding him close, pressing his face into Ace's hair. ]

You can stay with me. You can stay with me as long as you need. I've got you.

[ He doesn't know how to handle the thanks. Hell, Red-Hair is who they all really owe. Maybe just being here will be answer enough. ]

[burnt_offering]

[He's still for a while after that. He doesn't know what he wants, or if he wants anything at all, aside from being tangled up with Marco like he's going to die again if he lets go. He's putting to much on him, it's a lot of pressure for one person to take, being the anchor of someone who's so traumatized that they're bouncing between believing they're dead and thinking they're alive. Someone who doesn't particularly feel like they deserve to be alive. But Marco is there, and Ace's heart feels like it's going to burst, and he'll just stay with him and soak up that feeling of life.

Marco has him. He's safe. And he just breathes against him, occasionally mumbling things like "You've got me." and "I'm alive." and "No one's gonna take me away."

And eventually, the tears and the mumbling actually cease completely. And all that's left is the sound of Ace softly snoring.]

[raiseyou]

[ Fuck... What a mess. What a hell of a way to come back. Watching worlds converge was one thing, getting hails from ships that both are his and yet aren't... but how and when the hell does anything bring someone back to life? And like a zombie on their own fucking grave to boot. ]

[ For the longest time, Marco just holds, and soothes, and agrees softly with each little mumble. He can feel Ace's jumbled energy breaking down. It's a relief when he slides into sleep, not for Marco's sake but for Ace's. Marco can't imagine the exhaustion. The panic. The confusion, the questions. Sleep should give him some time to settle. But he doesn't doubt it'll bring its own hell, expects the rest will be broken with nightmares. ]

[ There's no sense in going far. Marco eases Ace into his own shirt, covering the tattoo and the scars and scorch marks, and carries him to the nearest inn. Just a simple room, one bed. He's gonna hold his returned nakama while they sleep, so he can be right there when Ace inevitably wakes up in whatever awful state. ]

[burnt_offering]

[Ace is sleeping hard, he doesn't stir at all while he's moved, the bed doesn't offer him any more comfort than the ground would have. But for that night, as long as Marco is near, all is well and he sleeps soundly. There's an occasional whimper, a sound of distress, but as long as a part of him is physically touching Marco he settles from the start of his nightmares without much fuss.

But morning will come, and he'll have to deal with things then. But for now, sleep is a mostly welcome void, letting him leave the strain of this second life in the waking world for now. ]