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I'm looking for one of my assistants, she's gone missing.

Robin, are you there? We've got work to do.

[You might, however, find yourself in a busy port town with a bustling shopping scene. And in that town, you might just run across a tiny woman with a miniature bananawani hatchling sticking out of a very expensive purse. She's got her cigarette in a beautiful holder, a hoard of shopping bags hanging on her other arm, and she's definitely a little on the irritated side.

She's got a damn king to marry, and an idiot princess to dispose of fast. Or that's what she had to do. Who knows how she's going to manage now? Or more, how this world of worlds is going to manage having her.]

(OOC: Lady Crocodile, no hook, but you might wanna be careful around that hand anyway.)

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[Civil War is messy, dirty business. This is a much neater means to an end.]

I'm sure there's a place for congratulations somewhere. [So this isn't her Robin either. Too bad. It's so hard to have them all running off to the Straw Hat brat.] What are your plans now?

Edited 2019-02-26 23:11 (UTC)

[This is at least her semi-lucky day. This may not be her Robin, but at least she's also not Straw Hat's Robin.]

Sir Crocodile appears to be rather out of commission, which I suppose leaves me unemployed at the moment.

Although I gather that your own Miss All Sunday is currently absent from her post.

[Let's just let the implicit question - or offer - dangle.]

[Luckier than it was before. She's not going to turn down the opportunity to have her partner back, Robin's brilliance was beyond useful. And no matter how she'd scoff about it if asked, her company was superb.]

Then you and I will just have to make the best of things. Consider yourself hired. Text me when you get to Grandure 777 and I'll we'll talk there.

[It isn't long -- perhaps two hours -- when Robin texts again. Evidently this strange warp of the world placed her quite close by, with a brief ferry hop between neighboring islands the only obstacle.]

Interesting place to find yourself. Were you originally brought here when the "incident" occurred?

[One thing that she's noticed is that the way that travel works here is skewed. Something isn't adding up, it's bigger now, there's more ocean to traverse, but no one seems to struggle too much to easily get from point at to point b.]

I came later, after the fact. But no one can really seem to agree on when the incident actually happened first.

I would venture it isn't an incident at all. Ongoing phenomenon might be a better term. But of course, it can't be phrased like that to the general public.

[Is her irony properly coming through in text? She's rolling her eyes at the World Government.

Perhaps Crocodile will notice a discreet eye or two appearing in various places as Robin looks for her.]

[That gets her to laugh, that soft and distinctive chuckle that most find unnerving from a woman. The World Government is pathetic, clinging to things that no believes, and that power struggles already visible here are amazing to observe.

The World Government, the Marines, they're scrambling. While the pirates explore and thrive. It's the last thing the ruling class needed.]

It's chaos, that's what it is. But chaos brings opportunities.

[She notices. And she peers over at one of those eyes, and smirks as she walks. Although this Crocodile looks little like the men that are her counterparts, short and slim and undeniably feminine, she has enough traits to be recognizable for who she is. If you know what you're looking for at least.]

I'm hungry. Let's talk at a cafe, I've got a hell of a new employee to tell you about.

[The eye winks in acknowledgement, then vanishes in a tiny puff of petals.

Once Crocodile chooses a cafe, Robin silently makes her appearance, seeming to materialize out of the crowd without fanfare.]

A new employee? I'm all ears.

[Crocodile looks up at Robin, and smirks. This is going to be fun. Anything she achieves on her own can be done with far more ease and enjoyment with Robin there.]

I'm sure you are. But I'm ordering first, before I tell you about Salvador.

[A table for two is easily arranged, in a private enough setting. For this place, at least. And while they wait for waitstaff to attend to them, she's already making plans.]

[Private enough, and most importantly, neither of them have their backs to the room.

It's a good policy to wait for any substantive discussion until the initial visits of the smooth-talking waiter have come and gone -- not to mention that it serves as an opportunity for both of them to watch each other, to note the differences the different worlds have wrought in them.

The waiter, when he arrives, is smooth-talking, clearly keen to apply flattery in the hopes of boosting his tip.]

[So far, Robin seems just like her Robin. Maybe a little more cautious, but Robin is always cautious. Always hiding things. Always keeping her real intentions to herself. So in the end, this suits her just fine. If she's willing to play that important role, and be the company that Lady Crocodile quietly craves, she'll do well enough in her employ.

Lady Crocodile is oh so charming to the waiter, as he hands out glasses of wine on the house, suggesting meals of high cost because there's obviously money to spend here. And she's struggling, in a way that only her closest companions would see at all, she's holding her temper and behavior in so well behind that act of sweet but distant. But god, she wants to tell him off, and get back to the conversation she'd wanted to be having at this point. Why do so many stupid men linger?

She's got to keep up the reputation as the kind lady of the seas. The vigilante heroine. The pirate killer for the good of all. The future queen of Alabasta. People believe in her, in her goals and mercy. And it's pathetic. But she can't keep that reputation, and the benefits that come from it, if she's cruel to random workers. No matter how annoying they are.

As soon as they've ordered, and he's gone, she sighs. Very glad for the wine that was brought already, she needs it after that nonsense act.] So you want to know about Salvador? Hmm. You're clever and you keep your eyes open. Let's see if you can figure it out from the picture alone. [A photograph of Salvador, taken discreetly while pretending to play with her phone, is shown on the screen.] Anything familiar about him?

Edited 2019-02-28 04:38 (UTC)

[That's the sort of thing Robin is here for. She's a keen observer, and wise to the means and modes of manipulation; she can see clearly that Lady Crocodile's charm is deliberate, is a role played beautifully and perfectly -- and feels an equal annoyance at the waiter's cloying attention.

So she lets herself take the place of foil; instead of the smaller woman's immaulate charm, she is cold, and looks down her long nose at the waiter with a pointed show of immunity to his questionable charm. Not rudeness, no -- she is, if nothing else, in the company of a woman who must show charm. But she can be the less charming one, and he spends much less time paying attention to her, resulting in the quicker relief of his departure.

The photograph is intriguing, and she carefully does not react immediately, studying it with a thoughtful purse of her lips.]

Tall, isn't he?

[A casual comment as she thinks him over.]

Salvador isn't his real name, of course. But it's got an interesting derivation. One might say even quixotic.

[Language nerd, thy name is Robin.]

[Quixotic. Oh goodness, she missed Robin. What a sharp mind, she's entirely amused at how quickly she figured it out. Honestly, she got it quicker than Crocodile personally did, but that's not something she's going to bring up to her. She enjoys her company, but a girl has to protect her own fragile ego too. And what a foil she provides, cool and unimpressed and absolutely nerve-wracking to the waiter.

Just what she likes.]

And he's hauling my luggage and doing errands as a nine to five. I even had him carrying Baby for me. [The mental image alone gets that distinctive laugh out of her, a remnant of her time when she suffered in the male body that was once her prison. It's in a woman's tone now, but it's still the same cold chuckle.] Can you imagine what he might be thinking? Does he take me for a fool? [She doesn't even think to explain Baby, for now the sleeping toy bananawani will stay out of sight. She's not going to wrangle a sleeping monster out of his carrier purse.]

[So she was right. Half the game in presenting herself as indispensable is to take carefully calculated risks, and that was one. When Crocodile confirms it with a laugh that is terribly familiar, Robin relaxes very slightly. Be right, always be right, but never be so very right that you are a threat.

... She's extremely curious about what Crocodile would be calling baby, but that goes on the list of things she won't ask just yet.]

The possibility that he does not... that concerns me. [She offers the words with a careful deference -- not a contradiction, and certainly not daring to give advice. Instead, she is acting as the assistant -- the assistant chosen specifically for her sharp and flexible mind, among other skills.]

[Robin knows well how to stay on Crocodile's good side. She's also had the benefit of dealing with Sir Crocodile, which means she's used to a more fickle and irritable version. He's had no reason to have to hone his patience with people, to have to be sweet to further his goals. That act doesn't exist for him, so Lady Crocodile is easier to deal with as a rule.

But just as awful, if not more if you cross her. The saying about a woman scorned more than applies.] That's the issue, isn't it? I've got a few ideas about what he might be planning, but nothing concrete. Not yet. [She's going to find out, and Robin is going to do her share of the legwork. This is a valuable man, and she needs as much information on him and his past as possible. His name is recorded in the contacts, and that's a start.]

[Robin taps one finger lightly against the table as she considers the matter, and the photograph.]

Did he approach you, or vice versa?

[The glimmer of an idea is beginning to take form in her mind; it utilizes her strengths as an actress, and serves her own interests in the areas where they could conceivably divide from Crocodile's -- and yet, as long as the divide remains quiescent, the same tactic could serve in a completely loyal manner as easily.]

[The phone is put back into the pocket a moment later, and she sighs. This really is interesting, but what to do about all of it?]

He did. But I'm not certain he knew who I was at the time. Either way, he's certain now of my status. It's hard to keep secrets here.

[She wants Robin's opinion on this, what she thinks. While Crocodile knows damn well that she's brilliant, it's never foolish to have someone else painfully clever around to toss ideas about with.] What do you think?

That he approached you raises the risk that he has an ulterior motive. However, given his presumable connections, I would say that it's a risk worth taking, at least for the time being.

[She's careful to emphasize presumable -- they don't actually know the shape of that connection, but even without the current chaos, a connection between Baroque Works and the Donquixote Family could be a useful asset.

She taps her fingers against the table as she thinks.]

On his own, in isolation from his... connections... what talents has he shown you?

Presumable indeed. I'm almost certain, I just need a way to confirm it. He really could be a valuable investment.

[An angry set of squeaks starts coming from under the table at about that point, and she leans down to soothe her wayward pet. Hopefully he'll just go back to sleep and she won't have to actually deal with him when she wants to talk about important things with Robin.]

He's shown me that he's a klutz and that he's hardly suitable as eye candy. I fear for my luggage every time he picks it up. [She sits herself back up, and takes another drink, before continuing.] He claims that he's a retired guardsman from an unnamed island in the North Blue. He also mentioned that he knows something about handling Marines. That caught my interest.

[Eye candy... not something the Crocodile she remembers ever spent much time thinking about, but Robin's already getting a sense of the differences, and one of the major ones is a much deeper interest in the weaponization of appearance. Yes, eye candy fits in very well with that mindset indeed.

It makes her a far more dangerous mistress, of course, but what is life without danger? Robin has never known such.]

I can see why. It's a convenient cover for having some experience in how they operate, whether the true experience comes from being part of them or opposing them.

[She can guess at a lot, but guessing isn't knowing.]

All rewards come with risks. Do you have a use to put him to yet?

[She's a tiny woman, who few even take seriously at all. She's the Desert Queen, but no one really knows how powerful she really is. She's gotten weak minded men to do most of the work for her, helping her avoid dirty work while training in secret for decades. She's known for her kindness, for using her money and crew to keep the seas and land safe. She's weaponized femininity, and she does it well. And with Robin at her side, that power only increases.

She listens as Robin speaks, and takes another sip of her wine. That relaxed moment is broken quickly though. This time, the noise from the bag is getting distressed, loud squeaking sounding out as she tries to focus on Robin, and not her pet.

She finally just hauls a fat, grumpy bananawani hatchling out of her bag, and sits him at the table in the spare chair. Like there's nothing strange about this irritated looking reptile with a ribbon on it sitting like a small child with them.

At least he'll be quiet now.] So far, no. He'd be a good gift to Doflamingo to keep up alliances, whether I want them or not. So far, he thinks he's fooled me entirely and that's good enough to keep him careless.

[... Well now. That's something different. Robin raises a careful eyebrow at the bananawani, keeping her face otherwise studiously smooth. It's tempting, oh so tempting, to comment -- but she's not blind to the idea that this might be some other kind of test, so she sticks to the topic of conversation at hand, not letting herself be obviously distracted by the... pet.

She supposes this must be the 'Baby' mentioned earlier.]

A very good gift.

[And Doflamingo is someone to keep happy, even if an alliance is... chancy.]

Do you want me to cultivate him?

[Befriend a fellow underling of uncertain loyalty, and let him show any inklings he might have of rebellion. She's winkled dissent out of more than one organization this way.]

[Crocodile makes a soft sound of amusement at that raised eyebrow, and stifles her usual laugh. Robin hides so much, and holds so much back. And getting certain reactions out of her, things like caution, fear, or even simple enjoyment is something entirely entertaining. It's always more fun to get a person like her to respond.]

Doffy does like gifts. But I don't like giving them out too freely.

[She's managed to keep a good alliance with the Doffy from her world, but she also sleeps with him on occasion. They've bonded through sex, money, and mutual awful. But she's not entirely attached to him, there's nothing beyond terrible to keep a bond going. Which means her interests in pleasing him can shift at any given moment.

She nods at Robin's suggestion. If anyone can figure him out, it's her.]

If he lasts more than a few days, yes. I want to see if he's worth holding onto first, it's a waste of your time if I don't plan on keeping him.

[All obedience, Robin dips her head in acknowledgment, but there's a smile tugging around the edges of her lips. It's always a good sign when an employer appreciates her properly. A waste of your time says that Robin's time is valuable not only to herself, but to Lady Crocodile as well.]

And in the meantime?

[There's always work to be done, and this new occurrence means that they'll have their work cut out making sure that Baroque Works is still together and generally uncompromised. But she'll let Lady choose the direction to begin working -- no need to take the reins, not until she's got a better measure of this new version of her craftiest and most dangerous employer.]

In the meantime we collect the wreckage of the whole of the Baroque Works. Most of my male counterparts have abandoned their investments. Can you imagine how valuable those weaklings would be in mass? Even the most useless of them doubled up would be more than most could handle.

[And by we, she means Robin of course. She's not going to be without her hand in it, but she's got a wedding to plan out.] Of course, keeping a strong hand on the Alabasta situation is always a priority.

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